Pain pain...

Go away!

Actually, let's bring on the pain so I can GET THIS BABY OUTTA HERE!!

This past weekend I was away at our church Ladies Retreat. In my opinion it was one of the best that I've been to with this church (well done organizers!). Friday and Saturday night we had Vespers and I really enjoyed them. We do something similiar at my Wednesday night biblestudies. Something about ancient prayers heaped with tradition that I find soothing and comforting. This is just a sample of what we did on the weekend.

The Lords Prayer (taken from here)

Because we love God, we say:
Our Father who art in heaven,
Because loving God means that we yearn for God to make his glory known, we say:
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Because loving God means we love others as God loves others, we long for all to have the necessities of life, and we say:
Give us this day our daily bread.
Because we love others, we seek to unleash God's grace of forgiveness and say:
Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.
Because we love others, we long that they will love and live God's will, so we say:
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Because we love God, and because we love others, we lift our hearts to God and say:
For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory. Forever and ever. Amen.

We say this today becuase we love God and love others.

In the name of the Father precious,
and of the Spirit of healing balm.
In the name of the Lord Jesus,
I lay me down to rest.

The peace of all peace
be mine this night
in the name of the Father,
and of the Son,
and of the Holy Spirit.
Amen.

Magic words

When you're pregnant there are certain words that bring a smile to your face and there are some that don't.

When you walk into an office and the secretary takes one look at you and says," Whoa, you don't look good."

Those aren't no magic words.

Tuesday...

Is usually an enjoyable day. I get to go to Mom's and hang out kid free for a bit. The kids get a chance to go out and play with other kids. Steve spends most of the day at the church which frees us up to do whatever we want at home. It's usually a good day.

This morning I could barely keep my head up after I "woke" up. The kids didn't get to come to Mom's with me 'cos I had to leave early for a doctor's appointment (2 stones...the kids didn't get out and I had to leave early). Then Steve and I waited for 2 and a half hours (that's right, 2.5 hours!!!!) to see the doctor for a 10 minute pre-natal check up. I still can't believe it! Ugh!!

2 and a 1/2 hours...

So of course by the time we actually got home, the kids were up from their "nap" meaning I was given a slim-none chance of napping myself. And Steve took off right away for a chiro appointment that he had made, thinking he'd have tonnes of time beforehand to do some computer work himself.

What a waste.

I just hope the rest of the day goes well.

Oh yeah, and incase you're wondering, baby is fine. Meeting the delivery doctor went good (Steve made some crack about how we like to eat the placenta- which we don't- so I'm sure he's really looking forward to delivering our baby!) and now we just wait.

Pathetic I am

The kids have been home roughly 18 hrs. 10 of those they've been asleep.

I am

SO

TIRED.

It's amazing how much energy they suck out of you. Now I really know why I'm so tired this pregnancy. It's b'cos I have two extremely energetic kids.

Not to mention 10 minutes after they got home they managed to torpedo all the toys from their room into the living room.

This morning there's Rice Krispies falling from the roof. I mean where else would they come from to wind up all over the kitchen and living room. It's a miracle!

I can't wait for a nap.

Feet

I love feet. I love all the lines and muscles and veins that stick out and add character to a person's foot. Back in my drawing days (and Steve usually gets on me for not "re-living" my drawing days more often. My excuse is that I have no time nowadays, he says that's a lie, I say alright...I have to be in the right mood, he says it seems like I'm only in the mood to watch TV these days, and then we sit there glaring at each other for a while until I mutter something about he's right, that's all I feel like doing nowadays) I would take black and white photos of people's hands and feet and then sketch them. A person's hands and feet can tell alot about them. If they're workers, they're hands will be rough and grainy, if they're old they'll have wrinkles and life lines, and the young are smooth and sleek.

One of the things I love most about my body are my feet. I love how the veins stick out the top and you can see all the bones. One of the things I HATE most about being pregnant is that my feet swell up and I can no longer see any of these things that I love. It's like the last straw. I'm okay (well, no not really, but let's pretend) with the weight gain, the heartburn, the cravings and painful kicks, as long as I can still see and love my feet. But I tell ya, once those feet turn swollen and ugly, all hope is lost.

Same goes for my hands. I hate how they turn into little porker sausages and there's no hope at all of ever getting my ring off my wedding finger (well unless I stick it in the snow or the freezer for a length of time).

I really thought I'd avoid the whole swelling thing with a winter pregnancy. Sadly it appears not.

Happy BirValentine's Day

A few years ago I received a card from my hubby that said, "Happy BirValentine's Day". At the time I was both impressed that he remembered both (Valentine's Day and my birthday) and upset that he had combined them. You see today is my birthday. The day after Valentine's day.
The whole time I was growing up they never got entwined. It wasn't actually until I married Steve that they became one. And it wasn't until this year that they got righted again. B'cos the kids were gone all week we celebrated my birthday on Monday with supper out. Desserts with friends on Tuesday. Wednesday was Valentine's Day and today we headed to S'toon for a day out. In fact I'd have to say that this year has been one of the best in recent years. The phone rang this morning to wake us up. It was the kids singing Happy Birthday. I can only think of one better way to wake up, and that would be having them here. Then my 2 yr. old nephew phoned to wish me Happy Birthday as well. We had clear roads to and from S'toon. Got to see an awesome movie and had yummy burgers in our favourite pub for supper. It was a really good day!

In less than 24 hours the kids will be home and our "freedom" week will be done. I accomplished everything I set out to do, plus some, so the week in my opinion was a complete success!! I feel ready for the new arrival and can't wait to see what the next few weeks have instore!

First thoughts on "freedom"

The kids have been gone now for about 46 hours. The first thought when we got home, after dropping them off with my parents, was how quiet the house was. Steve quickly solved that by turning on Hockey Nite in Canada.

I'm thinking of things I can do this week without them. Get a massage. Eat cookies and not have to worry about sharing (that's so mean to say...yet so true!). Go out with the hubby and not have to worry about finding a babysitter, time constraints with babysitter and paying the babysitter. Bake apple pies without getting flour all over the kitchen (thanks to my little "helpers"!). And numerous other things. Mainly my goal is to go thru all the kid stuff, find and wash all neutral babystuff and organize the baby room.

What I've done so far?

Gone bowling till 2 am Saturday night. Napped for 3 hours Sunday afternoon. Watched movies again till 1 am Sunday night. Slept in till 9:20 am this morning (I had a doctor's appointment at 10).

So not alot.

And I miss them. I missed them before they even left. I actually miss hearing them cry out at night. I find myself checking in on their room at night, just to make sure everything's fine. I feel the urge to call my parent's and make sure everything is okay and I'm sure it is, they raised 4 kids of their own, so it's not like they can't handle 2.

But I'll use my emotional pregnant state as an excuse. After all I cried numerous times during the Grammy awards last night. That in itself is pretty sad.

So the clock is still ticking. The music is louder than it should be and we have over 96 hours left to go. I'm sure my opinion will change as we get closer to Friday.

Russian video

I received this in my e-mail today and thought it was pretty cool. Check it out. The story goes:

This tunnel in Russia is the longest in-city tunnel of Europe. There is a river running over it and water leaks at some points. When the temperature reaches minus 38 degrees like it did this particular winter, the road freezes and the result is the attached video taken during a SINGLE DAY with the tunnel camera. Congratulations to the dual bus driver .

What I can't believe is that after some of these major crashes, the other cars just try to get around them and continue on their way. Nice.

*Apparently I have no idea what I'm doing. When you click on the link above it takes you to the UTube site, but not the crash video, so you have to type in "russian tunnel" in the search area and then it will link you to the actual video. I still think it's worth checking out.

The new ketchup?

For lunch today Matthias wanted KD (a boy of my own true heart) and I asked Callah to help by getting the ketchup and chocolate sauce (for chocolate milk of course) out of the fridge. Which she did.

And I turned my back.

And she poured chocolate sauce into the pot of KD.

To be honest, it didn't taste that bad. Really sweet. It looked completely disgusting tho'.

Oh well. Lesson learned.

Congratulations?

Monday I went for another check-up to see if the baby had turned. It had. I was hoping that was all they would do, check the position of the baby, but no, I had to get the whole "experience" done once again (weighing, doppler and measuring). At the time I thought it was quite comical, the whole weighing thing, as I am 2 lbs short of being the biggest I've ever been (this is where the congratulations comes in?). You know I thought it would be funny to invent a card for pregnant mother's...Congratulations on being the biggest you've ever been! But that (sick) humour quickly faded and came to a sobbing hault last night, lying in bed. I felt repulsively huge. Definately not funny anymore.

I think tho' one of the things that's annoying me lately is myself. I'm getting jealous and angry at people who seem to have it all together. Seem so perfect. And I know that's just so wrong.

Last night I apologized to Steve for not being a trophy wife. For not being some pretty, little, "perfect" wife. I apologized for being a butch (big boned...yeah whatever....) and he said that's one of the reasons he married me, 'cos I AM a hard worker and not some trophy there to look pretty. I think that was a good thing, at least I know it was intended as a good thing.

And now I just feel miserable. A friend of mine loves being pregnant and loves to show it off (the fact that she is pregnant) and I guess I'm just annoyed 'cos I don't look like that, never will look like that and I don't have her confidence to show it off like that (even if I did). And so sometimes when I'm around her I feel like a large freak of nature. But what can I do to get around that? Avoid her? I honestly do enjoy her friendship, and like I said, I know it's just me 'cos I'm annoyed with other people too. So definately, I'm the problem here.

Argh...females are so complicated. Pregnancy sucks. And emotions can be so nasty.

I hate this moment right now.

That was totally wicked!!!

For the past 6 years (basically since I've lived in PA on my own - meaning without my parents) I always drag myself out in the bitterly cold to watch the Canadian Sled Dog Challenge. One year I even went out to watch them come in and close the race. To me there's something really exciting and ...well...Canadian about watching them. Maybe it has to do with the fact that when I was 5 I jumped off my bunkbed and landed feet first onto a miniature wooden dog sled. The handle part at the back broke and stabbed into the sole of my foot. I don't know, but the whole idea of battling the frigid cold and terrain with just a pack of dogs and a sled is really exciting (something you'd NEVER see on Survivor). This is just something that you don't see in very many places. I feel proud that I can experience a little bit of it. Now that I have children of my own, I drag them out to watch too. So that's what we did today. Right after my bible study we came home to pack on the clothes and headed out to the Lil' Red to watch the dog sleds. The kids were totally excited until we got out there and waited in the freezing wind for the first sled to come. But they lasted longer than we thought they would and Matthias, altho' complaining that he was cold, kept making snow angels in the ditch all the way back to the van.

We were watching them at the turn off the main road to Pine Grove. The organizers did it differently this year, as they had them run around the Lil' Red Park. Which maybe had it's good points, I don't know, but what I do know is that where we were watching, the road was pure ice. We watched 7 sleds go by and 4 of them slowed right down to a stop to turn the corner and one tragically overturned and both the musher and the passenger were thrown from the sled. The musher seemed a little out of it and the passenger had a bleeding nose, but otherwise unscathed. Steve felt like a hero as he ran ahead to catch the runaway dogs. That's my man!

Then we drove out to Emma Lake (my parents are looking at cabins out there) and on the way back we passed a HUGE accident that invovled a semi-truck and an SUV. The front tires of the trailer on the truck were completely destroyed and the whole front of the SUV was bashed in. Steve said it looked like the SUV hit the semi, got sucked under and spun out. I hope everyone was alright. The crash was right beside where the dogs run, so that too, I hope they are all alright.

And that's been our day so far. At least Steve is feeling better!

Random Blurbs

You know that scene in Fried Green Tomatoes when Kathy Bates' character is looking for a parking spot. She finally finds one, waits and signals her intention, and then backs up to let the other car out. Meanwhile a car comes around from the opposite direction and takes her place. A young, "hip" woman gets out of her shiny, new car and calls Kathy Bates something (I can't totally remember...it's been awhile). Today I felt like her...Kathy Bates' character. A "frumpy", tacky, "older" woman who was going for this spot when a younger woman came from the opposite direction to take my spot. I was sure feeling like smashing my van repeatedly into the younger woman's car (what Kathy does in the movie), but instead I just settled for the "evil eye". Oh yeah, I think she knew where I was coming from.

My children can't be trusted. When they're hungry and there's food anywhere, and I mean ANYWHERE that they can reach. They will reach for it. We have this rule that if they don't eat supper, they don't get anything else to eat. Well this causes all sorts of problems in the morning when our kids wake up around 7 am and neither Steve or I are morning people, so come 8:30 -9 am when we finally make our way to the kitchen we find all sorts of surprises. Whole bunches of grapes mysteriously gone. Cookie jars half empty. Bananas half eaten (and then put back in the fruit bowl). Containers of chinese food (rice no less) on the kitchen table with spoons sticking out of them. Yesterday Callah actually came downstairs with an orange and a very sharp knife. They just can't be trusted with empty bellys. But it's not our fault they don't eat their suppers and we're not morning people...right?

Did anyone see Extreme Makeover Home Edition last weekend? They rebuilt a farm house for a woman and her 6 children after their father/husband died. It was a real tear jerker, especially then they replayed the 911 call. Very tragic.
Anyway, one of the designers put a sandbox in a 2 year old's room! A boy's room no less! Are they crazy??? The designers actually "polled" a crowd of Mom's... and the Mom's agreed it was a good idea!!! You name me 2 Mom's who would love to have a 5ft long sandbox in their 2 year old boys room!! Crazy.

I went for my 32 (or as I like to think ahead...33) week check-up on Monday. I was looking forward to it. This was the day I was suppossed to switch over to the replacement who will be delivering our baby (our real doctor is in Africa somewhere I believe). Well first off, I weigh more than I apparently should (the doctor always tells me that my weight is coming along "a little too good" - cheeky english doctor guy who is replacing my real doctor...that's right, this pregnancy I'm seeing 3 different doctors!) and then he does the hand to belly probe where he checks the babies position only to tell me that the baby is breech again. But don't worry, it's not something we worry about till 34 weeks (uh yeah...that's like A WEEK AWAY!). Then to ease my mind he has trouble locating the heartbeat, and according to my ears, it appears a little slower than it has the past 6 months. No, I'm not worried at all. So back I go to the little english man in a few days, and this baby has rotated again into the proper birthing position, then hopefully I can switch to the other doctor.

We had a really good Mom's Committee Meeting today. I feel like we're going to be touching our inner "child" with some activities coming up. Should be ALOT of fun. I'm really looking forward to it.

Anyway, Steve's sick in bed (I tell ya, he's gone all weekend at a youth "retreat" comes home and is in bed the next 2.5 days with a severe head cold...sometimes I wonder about him...), the kids are fast asleep and I hear a warm bath calling.

Later.

George

Last night was a bit of a mess. I don't sleep very well when Steve isn't around (I know I would nearly die if he was doing shift work or gone for weeks like many of your husbands do) so I try to stay up as long as I can and then go to bed. Friday nite I watched Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 'till about 1 a.m. Last night I watched Must Love Dogs 'till 12:30. And I thought I was tired, but not tired enough I guess. Maybe it was the 2 tall glasses of ginger ale that did me in, as I was up every 20 minutes to pee or maybe I'm just not used to sleeping in the basement yet as every little squeak and noise caused my tired eyelids to bolt open and become completely alert. Either way the last thing I remember was thinking about George for some reason.

Ahhh...now there is one sexy man.

Ho hummm

Even tho' Steve technically hasn't left the city yet, so begins my 48 hours of being housebound. He's leaving to take 6 youth to Norquay, Saskatchewan on a youth retreat 'till Sunday. This isn't the first time, but for some reason, this time really sucks. Maybe it's because I'm pregnant, maybe it's because it's winter, but more than likely a combo of the two as I've been left home alone before, carless, in the winter and it hasn't bothered me this much before.

Ho humm...and already the kids are testing my patience. It's like they know that Daddy is gone and Mommy's tired and slow, so let's take advantage of her.

Oh well, Steve should be back in roughly 47 hours, 48 minutes and 15 seconds.

Words that start with "h"

Hemorrhoid. Heartburn.

This is going to be an awesome post!

And from there I'll just stop.

I've had alot on my mind lately and yet nothing seems to stay there for very long. I'll think of something and the next completely forget and it'll slip my mind until it's too late to do it or too late to ..well...do it. I don't remember pregnancy being like this before. Is it something new? If so, the 4th is looking less and less likely. I can just see myself running around stark naked, in my 3rd trimester with a feather boa wrapped around my middle! That'll look really good in the baby book!!

So the other night I had a dream. I was late for aquasize and really had to pee, but when I got to Marion Aquatics, the bathrooms were out of order, so then I had to go back outside and enter through a different door. At first the lady at the counter wasn't going to let me in to use the bathroom (b'cos I wasn't signed up for classes there), but I eventually weasled my way in and was completely amazed when I saw their "version" of bathrooms. It was like 3 rows of 20 or so chairs, all side by side and completely in the open. So much so, that you could see what everyone was "doing" (if you catch my drift). I was completely disgusted, but had to pee REALLY bad, so I sat in one of these chairs and then I couldn't get the little pedal to move (like an outhouse toilet) and so it went everywhere. What a mess! Of course I don't remember having to clean it up, I must've just ran out of there and back into Marion, where surprise, surprise, they had fixed the toilets and was late for my aquasize and it completely ruined my night!

Last night, I ran out the door for aquasize, a little later than usual, and really had to pee. Hmm...deja vu? Luckily everything was in working order and aquasize went on without a hitch.

Crazy.

Then (and I'm just going to mention this 'cos it just happened a little while ago) today Callah comes downstairs and I could smell that she's done something nasty. She's says, "Mommy, I poop." Okay, at least she's telling me, so I swing her around and it's BUBBLING up her pants! No word of a lie, there's pooey bubbles coming out. Sick!! I've never seen that before, part of me is amazed and the other is completely repulsed! Anyway, she's all showered and clean now. So it's all good.

Mom's today was pretty cool. Melissa Drury shared her love of photography and for someone who's never taken a class (on the subject) she sure knows alot. Of course, nothing against her, but I'm a firm believer that anyone can take a picture. So originally I was going to post some of my latest favourites along here, but my computer is acting up and freezing and that just won't do for now. So maybe later. But you can check out these sites that I like to browse from time to time.

Chow.

Pepsi

I really have nothing new to say just that I really like that Pepsi commercial with Parker Posey and Jimmy Fallon.

Always makes me want to get up and dance.

That's all.

Turn right...NOW!

Today Matthias drove us home from the library, all by himself.

Well not exactly.

When he told me to turn left at the lights onto 1st Ave, I thought I'd let him direct me the rest of the way. And he was bang on!! We just have to work on giving directions BEFORE the actual intersection. Luckily traffic wasn't that busy.

Rattin' *&%$%*!@$# stupidhead

I realize the last thing I should be doing is writing on this thing when I'm fuming mad, but really, he doesn't read it, so who cares?

Sigh.

It's already been one of those days and all I want to do is curl up in my bed with a 2L of ice cream. Chocolate ice cream. With bits of fudge and chocolate mousse in it.

Sigh.

Well, after taking a 15 minute break and some seriously deep breaths I've calmed down some and will continue this post in a different direction.

A friend and I have started taking aquasize. I took it almost 3 years ago (wow it's a lot longer than I thought!) when I was pregnant with Callah as well. Not sure if it actually did anything (I can remember taking more pee breaks than actually excercising!) but figured it was better than sitting around doing nothing in the cold winter months. So here I am again, with the same thought process behind me, only this time around, instead of being 4-7 months pregnant, I'm STARTING the crazy thing 8 months pregnant and will be ending 1-2 weeks before I'm actually due. Now you tell me...good or bad idea? Sometimes I wonder. However after the first 2 lessons I'm feeling pretty good and have had no new pains or discomfort. That's a good sign. I think it's more pyschological than anything. If I let myself think about doing it this late on, I worry that I'm doing the right thing. On the other hand, I know that if I go at my own pace and do what I can I should be alright. So really there's no point in worrying. Right?

And then there's Callah. Since we started potty training, she's mysteriously become...how do you say it? "Plugged"? I was a little worried, again if you read Dixie's blog you'll know that they've had problems with Madeline holding in her poop. And Callah's always been regular before, so I started to think of things that always make me...uh...go. Macarooni, fast food, cheese and finally we hit the jackpot today! Slurpees! Who says they're not good for anything? Got a bowel problem? Drink a slurpee! Man was it a doozy!! Hopefully we'll figure out what's plugging her up and fix it before it causes some serious problems. And I really hope it's not from potty training, she's actually doing pretty good!

Sometimes I wonder about my crazy in-laws...

That's better

This morning I went for my 30 (or 32 week depending on how you look at it) check-up. B'cos my ultrasound put me 2 weeks ahead (usually they go 2 wks behind) and all my measurements are bigger than they "should" be (or it's a freakin' huge baby, which I'd rather not think about) I go more by my ultrasound due date, which is March 10. Besides, I'd rather be 32 weeks than 30 weeks anyway. That much closer to popping this thing out.

Speaking of thing... in church yesterday it's like the baby did a complete 360 roll. I told Steve the next thing I expect it to do is rip out of my stomache and start singing and dancing (think Spaceballs). We both got a chuckle out of that.

I don't know why but everytime I get pregnant, until I actually see a baby, I think alien.

In other news, since we're in this stinkin' deep freeze, and the kids and I aren't really going anywhere, we decided to give potty training a try with Callah. Ideally of course, we'd love to have her trained by March, but who knows. So far she's done pretty good. She's managed to go in the potty a couple of times every day and poop for the first time today, so that's a bonus. We also introduced Smartie's as a "prize". For every time she goes potty, she gets a Smartie. So now, of course, she spends most of her time on the potty just hoping something will come out so she can get the special treat!

Anyway I just remembered what I wanted to mention that was "better" before I got completely sidetracked with the alien story. So I went for my check-up and I only gained 2 lbs since my last check-up BEFORE Christmas! I was pretty stoked. To get thru the holidays and only gain 2 lbs is a special feat, but to do it while being pregnant, shoot, I should win peanut buster parfaits for a year!! That would be truly awesome!!

Talking Heads

This week has been a real doozer. Started out by waking up Monday morning to all 4 of our tires slashed on the van. The rest of the day pretty much sucked. Think all you want on things like the jack breaking, poop flying, food slopping and things dropping. Think the worst and that was our day. It ended nicely, we were warm in our comfy beds and all was quiet, so I won't complain about that.

Tuesday was snow day. Steve's neck was hurting like a bugger, so he ventured out to the chiropractor and rented some movies on the way back. That pretty much sums up the next few days as well. I hate snow days. And reading other people's blogs and what they thought of the "worst storm in 10 years", was kinda funny. I can remember walking 5 blocks to school, back when I was younger, through blizzards. I'd be so decked out, with long johns, pants and ski pants. Toques, hoods and my Grandma's homemade scarf wrapped like 8 times around my head so that just a little slit of skin was open so that I could see. That was winter. When there were snow drifts as tall as our van. It doesn't get like that anymore, and when it does, like Tuesday, the world seems to stop. We can't cope with the winter's of the past.

And then of course, after the snow came the cold. I'd still rather take cold than hot anyday of the year. You can always put on more clothes, but there's a limit to what you can take off. So the cold doesn't bother me. The only problem these days is I can only fit so much under my skipants. They're a wee tight themselves. And with the cold comes troubles all it's own, like vehicles not starting and so forth. The kids are getting antsy so we threw them outside today. Before you get the wrong impression, it was their idea. So they went, and they lasted for about 15 minutes before coming back in and saying it was too cold. At least they tried.

Then came Friday and I was able to get out on my own to do some errands like visiting my Grandma at the hospital which was infuriating in it's own way. She looked so tiny and frail in that hospital bed and you just wanted to kick all the nurses standing around talking and laughing while she waited for someone to wash her face...for the first time that day...at 4:00 in the afternoon. That night I went to a movie/fondue/prayer meeting. It was great and made the rest of the week so worth it. Thank you ladies!

As for the subject heading. Steve and I rented Clerks 2 (not recommendable) and we stopped it about 10 minutes in. I told Steve that the best thing about it was the song they played during the opening credits. It was Nothing but Flowers by the Talking Heads. My Dad went thru a Talking Heads phase back when I was about 12. They were awesome!

Anyway, I just hope next week is better.