Saturday, May 06, 2006


Sometimes I think I think too much. Making mountains of mole hills and giving myself countless hours of sleepless nights. I also think that's a woman's thing, but if I'm wrong then I need a new excuse. My latest thought process' have been about summer and friendship. I freak out constantly about not knowing where and what and when we're having summer holidays. Mainly b'cos I want to ensure that we do get summer holidays. Steve is the kind of person, where if you don't make plans, the time flies by and it doesn't get done. That's why I'm pushing the whole holiday thing. I NEED summer holidays. A few good days of camping will cure whatever itch I've got.

I've been thinking about travelling. The thought occured this morning that I'm a traveller stuck in a body in Prince Albert. Not everyone is a traveller. Some prefer, even if given the opportunity, to just stay put and never go further than their back yards. Myself, I love travelling. I think it comes from my parents, who altho' have only recently went overseas, took us somewhere every summer. We toured Canada, from BC to Quebec, numerous times during my youth and hit many of the States along the way. So when I hear of people who get these awesome opportunities to go somewhere and don't take it b'cos they'd rather hang out with friends at home, I want to just kick them in their butts and say "get moving!". I'd SO gladly take their places. Or they're humming and hawing over whether they should go, well they may never get another opportunity to go, and then they'll regret it when they're older, with kids, and many more responsibilities then they had in their youth.

As a side note. I love Pearl Jam.

Then there's friendship. I laugh at Matthias when he meets someone new. Right away they're his best friend and he loves them. He can't wait to go outside and play with them. His new friends are all he talks about for a few days. It occured to me this morning (I do alot of thinking when there's no kids around...this morning was my morning off, so Steve had the kids and took them shopping) that I'm just like Matthias. I don't have many friends, and so when someone actually wants to be my friend, I smother them. I'm like a 3 yr old and all I want to do is hang out with my new friend...ALL THE TIME. While painting our fence a few moments ago, I also thought that it's like I think they're cheating on me with other friends. I know they're doing stuff with other people, so why when I ask, do they always say no. It's so stupid. How old am I? Anyway, I guess the moral here is that I just have to step out and make more friends. Right?

Now for lunch, and hopefully some rest from my thoughts.